You Are Not The Only One.

There have been many times in my life where I have found myself in a situation where I have felt like the odd one out. This can leave you feeling quite isolated, and cause you to question yourself. There were many times, and still are, where I question if I am doing the right things, or if I should be doing what others do. Fortunately, I have always been quite sure of my own decisions, regardless of what others think. I know what I enjoy in life, and if that is different to most people, I am ok with that. In fact, I quite like it. 

However, it is not easy to feel ok being different to those around you. Whether you have recently made changes to your life, or have always felt a little bit like the odd one out, I am here to help you realise, there is no such thing as the ’odd one out’. We are all unique, and the most important thing in life is to be yourself. If those around you don’t agree with your behaviours, there are others that will, you just need to find your people. You do YOU. 

At times I have felt like I am the only one who…

…doesn’t drink. 

I don’t drink, for many reasons, but I can understand why people may enjoy having a drink when out for dinner or meeting up with friends for a few drinks. However, society has normalised drinking to the extent that if you don’t do it, you’re deemed not normal.

I always believe in letting people be. They can do whatever they want to do, it’s their life. I am frequently asked, why don’t I drink, or told, go on just have one, but no one ever asks someone, ‘why DO you drink’ or says, go on, just have water tonight. If you don’t drink, whatever reason that may be for, and sometimes feel like you’re the only one, you are not! There are so many people who don’t drink, for so many different reasons, but the reason you don’t realise this when you go out to a bar with your friends, is because they either aren’t there, or if they are, they don’t want to make it obvious they’re not drinking. You be you, and don’t feel you have to do something just because others are. 

…spends their weekend running.

To me, a weekend of training and food, is the ideal weekend. A good run followed by brunch is the best thing I could ask for. I also know plenty of people who feel the same. There are a lot of runners out there who do plan their weekends around running, you just need to find them, and soon enough you’ll realise you’re not the only one who enjoys this. 

If those around you find it weird that you prioritise running, exercise, or any other sports when it comes to your weekend, because you ENJOY it, remind yourself that you don’t need to apologise or justify your actions. Everyone is entitled to spend their time in the ways they most enjoy. We don’t need to pass comment on every choice someone else makes, so if they do to you, don’t feel the need to explain yourself. 

….doesn’t enjoy nights out. 

There are a lot more people who don’t enjoy nights out clubbing than you realise. Sure it can be fun when you’re with your friends, but it’s just not my cup of tea. The first few weeks at university I forced myself to go, and because everyone there was having a great time (obviously, the people who hated it weren’t there!) I felt like I was the weird one for not enjoying a second of it. I continued to go a couple more times, before asking myself, why was I putting myself through something I hated. The only answer I had was, because I felt I had to. I thought it was what uni students did. I then realised, I didn’t have to do it, so I stopped going! I’d still join everyone before they went out, as I enjoyed that social side of it, but when they left, I went to bed, and had had a great evening. I stopped myself from doing something I hated just for the sake of it. As a result, I had a much better time, and no one even realised I wasn’t there! 

All of these can, speaking from experience, make you feel like a bit of an outsider. Whether you only experience one of them, it can have an isolating effect, but it doesn’t need to. 

Even if you sometimes think you are the only one, I can guarantee you are not. There are so many people in this world, who do/don’t like the same things as you. It’s not weird, its not abnormal, it just isn’t what some of those around you do. Your people are out there, you just need to find them. 

These are only a few things that people may feel alone for doing, but I hope they show you that whatever you do, you’re not alone!